why am i a pleaser?

ever since i was a kid, i was a pleaser. I always think of what people will say and if they like me or approve of me. I remember when it started. When i was really young, I was like every other kid - i say what I think. And it has gotten me into a lot of trouble - other kids thought I was a snob and an asshole. I remember the exact time I converted into pleaserboy. I was watering the garden in front of my house when about 4 of my friends came over and told me off. It felt like an intervention, but it was more of them ganging up on me because they can't tell me stuff each on their own. I was astounded and flustered. How dare they? But my feeling of being part of the group got me more than my pride. So from then on, I became a pleaser. I guess I have learned to say no and also not care about what people will say in some areas of my life where it mattered. And as i grew older, I knew I wasn't going to let of of it entirely - it's like an addiction that you don't entirely grow out of (my friends probably knew about it, hence the "intervention"). But hey, now that I am writing a blog, this is probably one space where I can say what i want and wouldn't care if people care about it. So, I guess , from now on, that will be added to my blog list - this blog will include uninhibited opinion from me, whether you like it or not. ok? is that ok? i hope  so. oh well.

bigboy promises to get back to you soon with new news! nunus!